there is no easy path

Do you ever wonder if you have missed the point in some senses? I have been really concerned about my life this week. I have always banked on music as my ticket into ministry, and that pastorship/missionary work is all something for when I am older. I believe God has given me a gift in music, and I am using it right now. I just feel a deeper calling in a sense. I really want to see lives changed in a day-to-day manner. I am really tired right now, so I might just be speaking out of my sleepiness. I just hope that I figure things out soon. For the record, this entry is just how I am feeling right now; it has nothing to do with my band or church. It is simply a diary entry, and a vent for frustrations in my life.

Simply Complex

I have been struggling the last few days with simple faith vs. complex faith. The Bible talks about having faith like a child. It also speaks about digging deeper and deeper into the things of God. This has been the conflict in my mind that past week. I came to a realization, however. God isn’t looking for simple-minded believers. I think when the Bible talks about “Faith like a child”; it is about taking delight in everything. If you look at a child, their life is so amazing. A smile from their daddy, or a hug from their sibling is a huge source of happiness. I think in some ways, that’s how God wants us to view our beautifully complex relationship with Him. It is not wrong to question things, or research, I think God promotes it. I just think we need to take delight in the simple pleasures, and the basic fact that we serve such an awesome God. This is a fairly straight forward entry, I hope it is encouraging

2+2=5

So who would win in a cage match, Science or Art? In modern day, I think most people would answer that question with, “Science”. We are in an era (no matter how artistic you think you are) that worships science. With revolutionary thinking like Darwin and other philosophers, we have started viewing everything in terms of formulas and steps. Obviously, there is nothing wrong with science. God has created an immaculate universe, and I see it as an honor to be able to research it and gain more knowledge about it. I think the trouble lies when we start view God in terms of formulas and “5 steps to Christianity”. When we view things that way, we start extracting verses to further our
”hypothesis” or prove our own point. I think if you read through the Bible without this mindset, you will find a different story. From Moses to Paul, everyone communicated heart felt, poetic stories of a true relationship with God. I really think that there is an underlying language in the Bible. It is one of relationship and acceptance. To be 100% honest, I myself am still digesting all of this. I just wanted to throw out what is going on in my head currently.

So This is the New Year

We had a discussion on our last cell meeting that really sparked thought inside of me. We talked about our New Year’s resolutions. I thought about my goals for the year 2006, and by the end of the night, I realized they were all completely selfish. Nowhere in my list was outreach. It was all about SELF-improvement. I have been thinking about it a lot this week, and I have come to the conclusion that a lot of my growth can and should come through giving. I have said this in previous entries on here, but I want to reiterate that Jesus clothed the naked, fed the hungry, and gave to the poor. I feel like the vast majority of the things I do are simply to make my way of life better. I mean, it is simply our human nature to think of self first. It is the natural persuasion. I really think that when we can give up ourselves, we are opening a door to let God in. When I look at my past, the times I have felt most fulfilled were when I took my focus off myself. I realize this entry is probably a bit jumbled, but it has been pressing really hard on my heart. I have been feeling very confused about Christianity in general. I feel like a lot of the things I placed so much weight on, are less and less significant. I have the feeling that we have possibly misinterpreted the Bible in many ways. With that in mind, I find it is easy to become cynical. I have decided, that it is pointless to get to so technical when I am not following a lot of the basic principles that Jesus laid out for us. Anyway, hopefully this entry doesn’t sound negative. I honestly feel encouraged by it; Jesus has given us a blueprint on how to live the perfect life. Obviously, he realizes that we are going to screw up, but I feel that it is time for the church to step and think outwardly.